But. Oh but. The first trimester can be miserable! I suffer with morning sickness. All day long (and in the middle of the night!) I feel queasy. Sometimes it's just a mild, nagging sea-sick feeling. Other times it comes in waves; big ones, really close together.
This nausea really gets you down at times. There's just no escape from it. And from what I hear, I'm really one of the lucky ones! Touch wood, I've never actually been sick through morning sickness. Unlike a friend of mine who would keep carrier bags in her car to throw up in and then carry on to work! Or a couple of other friends who have ended up in the hospital on drips when the sickness was so bad it left them dangerously dehydrated. Not fun.
And, yes, there are things you can try to help reduce the sickness. I wrote a blog post about them here. Some of these things do help you feel a bit better, but the thing is, none of it actually makes the nausea STOP! I've spent the last few weeks feeling like there should be a cure. I'm used to modern medicine! Have a headache? Take some ibuprofen! Nasty cough? Knock back some cough syrup! So I've really struggled with accepting that there is nothing I can do to make this feeling go away!
And then there's the tiredness. Except it's not just 'tiredness'. It is sheer, body-draining exhaustion! Some days it's all I can do to stay up until Rhys is in bed. Worrying that I want to go to sleep before my 2 year old! When it's your first pregnancy it's not soooo bad. You can crawl into bed straight after dinner. You can stay there all weekend if you need to. When you already have a child those options aren't really there so much. Which is why I am so grateful that I have a very sweet husband who has been sending me back to bed for naps at the weekend. Women who do this alone have my utmost respect.
There are times in the first trimester when the world just feels too much. When you're exhausted and your sense of smell is in overdrive it can all just get really overwhelming. The world is busy, and loud, and hard to cope with some days. You can really feel like you just want to retreat back to bed. For a really long nap!
But. Oh but. It's an amazing time. When you've been trying for a baby and you see that line appear on the pregnancy test. I'm not sure much else can compete with how wonderful that feels.
And all those negative things you've been experiencing? They are all a direct result of your body doing something that I just can't quite wrap my head around! From practically nothing I am growing a baby. Now I know women have been doing this since the dawn of time but still it amazes me! I am in awe of what my body is doing; this new life it is supporting.
So I'll take the sickness. And the exhaustion. And the crying at the drop of a hat. If it means I get to hold another newborn in my arms that I've given life to, I'll take it all.